sleep

LOL, yeah, I think it's true for me, especially in the afternoon, in class or lab, waiting for stage #3 to happen soon but apparently it doesn't until the break or until the end of the class! =D

But anyway.. For me, I need enough sleep (6-7 hours) every night for my body to function well. And yep, I am still working on repairing my biological clock so that I go to sleep, wake up and do everything in normal timing. Well, this is just my nature to be a planner, maybe.

I don't really understand how some people here can manage to go to sleep for only 3-4 hours or so? Or to wake up late at 10 or 11 in the morning everyday, even near lunch time, and to go to sleep at 3 or 4 or 5 am? Or maybe I just overrate this. But are they still functioning well and healthy?

Career planning in 60 secs

and many, many more to think about.



Life's hard. Choosing is hard.

Being picky is hard, specially when people's opinions must be taken into consideration. Even though my intention is not being picky nor arrogant. It's jut not me. It doesn't make me happy nor I love. And furthermore, it doesn't pay well, too.

The latter isn't really about career, though, but I am fed up with people's judgements and whispers behind my back, even though, it's true, they don't harm me, we're still in good terms but it's like having thousands of pair of eyes prying on me because I don't do what they expect me to do. Now I feel like my life, my opinions, my choices must really be influenced by those of others', otherwise I'm wrong. Like, I don't have some says about my own choices. Facing them is wrong, running away is wrong as well. And it's like having no one to trust and no one to talk to.

~lalala~

bubbleteaology.

While browsing through tumblr and flickr, I found these two photos in this post. Apart from the nice photo people able to create (everytime I took photographs from my room, I don't think they are very nice. It's unknown whether it's my lousy skill or my desk's unattractive appearance). Anyway, this is about that thing there. Bubble teas receive a huge craze in Singapore. It is quite easy to find places who sell bubble teas, starting from small shops in MRT stations or neighborhoods or school until a well-known (and mostly expensive) brands such as sweet talk, each a cup, happy lemon, KOI and gong cha. And people do queue to buy them. Just like what they do when they want to top-up their bus passes during the peak hour at MRT stations and bus interchanges. Just like when there are freebies giveaways.

I have one post on my opinion on bubble tea in my tumblr blog, but since I like to write better in blogger (for me tumblr is only for short comments and photographs and "scrapblog") I will rewrite it in my lengthy, thoughtful style here.

I actually don't really into the bubble tea craze. Of course it's nice to drink them once in a while, because they are light and refreshing. A lot of my friends seem to like them too. But I don't really know what is so special about them, I think I posted this here after I drank KOI for the first time. Some of my friends, be them Indonesians, locals or other international students agree with me that it is the bubbles/chewy black thing at the bottom of the glass that make the drink delicious.

In general, I don't really like the hand-made teas commonly available in Singapore. Most of them are served in milk and I don't really like milk tea be it cold or hot. I strongly prefer the teas served in Indonesia back then, they are tea only, without milk, and the taste of the tea is just.. like that. They are different than those blank tea (teh kosong) served in Singapore.

As I said previously.. I am on the side which think that the bubbles is what make the drink delicious. I found some other drinks also put bubbles inside, like some brands of soymilk.. And yeah, I'd prefer those than the sweet, diabetes-inducer, not-so-satisfying drink that I've been talking about. Besides soymilks are indeed healthier.

But if I had to choose to buy some drinks in a hot, hot day, I'd definitely go for Starbucks. The places are nice for hangouts or sit-and-talk-and-wifi or study, too! A cheaper option would be McCafe. But yep, McCafe is still expensive for me, so I'd go with bottled green tea instead. Or, being the mostly-occuring case, a chilled mineral water. Anyway, this post won't pose any offenses for those bubble tea lovers.. But yeah. Not everyone must agree with the majority, isn't it? =D Afterall, I do drink them once in a while.. And hey, they're nice photo objects too!


cr: flickr
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PS. Anyway, one day after I posted in my tumblr about the bubble tea craze.. My lab decided to buy KOI. And... Yeah. I participated. What a mouth --a

Lab rules violation

Hey, anyway, hello Mr. Jack Hodgins. Looks like you’ve violating a rule in the lab: sleeping in the wet lab. Even though your lab is mostly bio.. But I think it’s still against the rules since you might inhale quite a lot of unhealthy substances since your solvents, they’re chemical. And, in addition, it’s your PREGNANT wife whom you set the sleeping bag/portable bed/matress for, dear. As someone who has 3 PhDs in sciences (which I can't really remember..), you ought to know..

Anyway, it’s quite pathetic to literally sleep at night in the lab, you know. Or just, living out your life in lab, whether it is for work or leisure purpose (e.g. internet connection and pantry and air-con and computer and toilet of your lab). This doesn’t apply to Hodgins though, but I hear some people do this practice and all I can say is.. "I wish you'd gone home". Well, unless the lab is your home.. But how if there's nobody there, only you? Can you still call it "home" and your set of machines, apparatus, solvents and materials as family members?


Eh, anyway, letting the romantic-sappy side of me out, I did hope that Hodgins' answer after Angela told her that she'd wish he'd gone home is "Well, I'm there. My home.. It's YOU". Kyaaaaaaaaa >.< If only the situation wasn't this.

courting ethics is courting ethics. but.....

The same as posted in my tumblr. I think it's nice to put it here also since I haven't decided between blogger or tumblr I know some of my personal nice fellows who somehow love the topic of "dating courting ethics" will actually read this. About a group of unusual people happen to co-exist in our lives. This doesn't make me question or have my beliefs shaken, I just ponder about this since the pinkdot movement in Singapore last weekend and @alittlelamb's (I believe she's clearly straight and not in a relationship with her co-star and ex-roomie! Go to and spend time at all-girls school and you'll know why) blog post some time ago.

---

Each of God's creation is wonderful on their own.

But with the resentment towards the LGBT community, even from the Christian community with the belief that the Bible shouts the disapproval towards those people, I sometimes wonder, "are they not created by God? But God is the creator of all things, so why are there such a big resentment and alienation towards them, even from the Bible itself? How if it is actually genetics and not lifestyle choices? Naturally, genetics are not a thing we can control, we only can predict the outcome but ultimately God decides which dominant and recessive genes will be expressed so that sometimes genetic engineering doesn't get what it wants the fenotype and genotype of the modified organism to be in perfect condition. Well, unless the parents want to have a genetically-modified children to satisfy their own desires."

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I've seen the example of some members of LGBT community or even those who have undergone surgery who stay close to God (not necessarily Christians). Are they sinners? Don't they love God enough? Don't they try to obey what God said?

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I believe if they can choose, they also don't want to be born as those who are thought as abnormality in the society. Or worse, an abject.

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Anyway if it is actually lifestyle choices, then, I won’t shout any opinions anymore. That'll be clear though, I'll stick with what I believe in.

Finally, I have some time to write

I guess it's been a long time that I haven't updated this blog. Yeah. A friend had asked me about that earlier.. And yah. I'm working now, in that same old brand new lab. There are more people now, compared to three of us last year. It's merrier, but at the same time, it's been harder to work at the same rate as I did before. Well then, now I've got to work on Sat but I am entitled one day off-duty in weekdays. Not bad. It's quite tiring, and I spend most of my time in my lab since I am doing the tedious process of preliminary results, so I'd be more active in tumblr since it has the application for phone so that I can easily post whatever I want (short posts only, that's what my tumblr is for, aside of reblogging) from my phone while I'm running the program for my experiment. So yep, I'm still around. Don't worry.

Anyway, I've been using my days off to work with the school as helpers in chemistry workshops for JC and sec students, so apparently, they are another kind of labwork. But these few days had been fun! The last time I taught chem in A-level prep in Indo, I didn't think that I did very well, because one, I communicate by writing better and two, it's quite hard to me to communicate in Indo properly now. Furthermore it was organic chem which was (and still is) not the field that I am interested in and am currently working on (but yeah, it's relatively easier to understand compared to quantum chem and kinetics). Alright, no excuses! On the positive side, the lesson earned from the past experience combined with my love to labwork have brought me to understanding of the teaching and learning process itself. Plus I speak in English more, so that's good since I am working on speaking fluently and correctly, which I am struggling on because of the Singlish-around-me atmosphere.

One of my friend shared this to me.

"A US chem professor ever said that, if an undergrad, even PhD student can't make even secondary school students understand about the chemistry they're doing, then they are not a good scientist at all."

So? It's like telling me to be a gracious and respectable chemistry student who are reliable, knowledgeable, fair and considerate. Specially like those research students who are blessed enough to do good projects with a superb and helpful professor and mentors and labmates and chances to publish papers afterwards.

At the same time, I'm worrying about my grade as well as hall allocation. The NTU system is somehow mysterious. I've even lowered my standard to "no F in the transcript". So yah. Please God. Please.

I only hope this hardwork pays off. The nature of my work now is a die-die-must-finish-in-one-day, so I must try to come as early and work as efficiently as possible if I don't want to spend my night in the lab and not on the mattress provided by my hall, which I have been close to. Even though it's not King Koil anymore, it's much better than carton boxes on the floor. The synthetic lab training had given me some useful skills to be applied in a general labwork, even though I am far, far, far away from synthesis and organic chemistry.

And I've been treating someone badly today. It was nice that the person did something good. But then I did not treat that person properly. I feel like I'm reeeally a bad person who can't appreciate the blessing that God has given me in the form of friends. I must be more grateful to the people who stick to me through thick and thin, aren't I? Sheesh.

When I say "I am a Christian"...

cr: tumblr

Cut here, tear there, and enjoy the bits!

cr: topit.me

Don't do it, people. It does not worth it. Your hands and veins are not plastic bags.

"Do you ever feel already buried deep, 6 feet under scream and no one seems to hear a thing?
Do you know that there's still a chance for you,
cause there's a spark in you,
you just gotta ignite the light and let it shine
just own the night like the 4th of July!"
Katy Perry - "Firework"

Well, it's no secrets among my friends that I don't like her voice. But this song talks a lot and I kinda like the lyrics so I just post it here.. Uh anyway, ofc Glee has made this song more listen-able for me. LOL.

Agony

cr: tumblr

My hall (and the whole campus') internet has been really bad for the past 1 or 2 weeks. For those of you who have my twitter or google buzz, you might notice that I've been complaining about that for several times. It has been hard to download anything, the browsing, download and upload speed is not as fast as before, and the worse is sometimes the internet is down. So at times, I can't browse anything. Well, for me internet is not merely for entertainment and only-for-fun stuffs. It'd been hard for me to read papers (yes, JOURNAL PAPERS or EXAM PAPERS not the word "paper" students and teachers use in Indo which I think, has different meaning), google something out, read wikipedia for basic stuffs, etc.

One thing that disturbs me is the worse download speed for YouTube. It's no secret that while I was still in Indo, the internet speed was much worse than what I have here in Singapore/NTU. Now I can listen to a lot of good songs, be them from the original artists or its cover versions (esp those whose originals are creepy =p), uploaded at YouTube. And they are completely legal, because recording labels upload songs there as well, for promotion or outreach. So there should not be any copyright infringement. It keeps me updated with new songs or songs that I've never heard of and were recommended to me by my friends as well. Some of my friends also record their performances and upload them in YouTube, too. Creativity matters and appreciation required. So IMO, there's no reason to ban or block access to this.

Lately YouTube (or NTU internet..) has been acting strange. Sometimes the videos can't load at all. Sometimes they load only a part of it and then, can't continue or become buffering. Sometimes the bar shows that the video has been completely buffered, but in fact not all parts can be played. So I can't listen to a lot of various songs while I am studying (yea, exam is near) or doing my reports or doing any other things (browsing, blogging, editing photos, etc).

It is not really bad, since I have my phone and my mp3 player, but the songs inside them are limited (both of them don't have big memories, once again because there's YouTube so I just put in songs that I really like) and sometimes after 4-5 cycles of the same set of songs in a day, I'll get bored.

One alternative is to shuffle series and films to keep me company but I will have the tendency to watch them instead. So, a big no. There's Glee which has a lot of songs but still, it is series that has story and watch-able (and its new episode will be out next week!! How am I supposed to watch it without decent internet speed?)

I know exam period is near and maybe the school wants the students to concentrate on studying and achieve good academic results so the university reputation will be improved (well, this is Asia and reputation are based on quantitative achievements and how do you compare to others.. meritocracy!). But does the school expect us only to sit down and cram for exams with our notes and textbooks without company or relaxation? Some brains, at least mine, don't function like that, else we might turn insane. Music and sound make our life normal and may increase our productivity and creativity.. So, if you don't want to produce robots, please return our internet connection!

What's wrong with studying?

As in, if you choose studying instead of gathering with friends, you're wrong. If you choose studying instead of attending other events or participating in a committee, you're really wrong, and lame.

Some people are just perfectionist, their standard of understanding course materials are higher than others. Some people also need longer time to grasp all the concepts. Some people just find studying (and learning) more interesting. Some people just have different priority. Of course, some people do not fall to any of the above criteria and most of the times, most of the people I've met, they are the people who judge those who simply spend more time to study. Basically, people are different.

Or studying is just an excuse for the person to spend time alone. It is just an excuse to allow you to go home and sleep without looked lazy or tired that leads everyone to ask a LOT to you. Some people give it as excuse while they are going to do something else later. Some people may just be tired of gathering and do activities. Or they simply don't like to be around those people.

Just in case you want to take a look and do something about it =)

http://athousandcranesforjapan.tumblr.com/

Think. Ponder. Decide.

After this, comes this..

cr: weheartit

Noticed this on twitter:



No Bahasa Indonesia?
I strongly believe that Indonesians are among top twitter users. Proof? Just check the daily trending topic. Some TTs are Indonesian-made, some TTs make it to the list because of the Indonesian users' contribution (especially those Korean topics.. DUH), and well, one of Indonesians' stereotype is : "I eat, I pray, I tweet". True.

Well, I'm not going to help them translate twitter to Bahasa Indo (my Bahasa for formal purposes is not so good either and has become even worse since I came here, lol) but they should really consider this. Should.

Does loving your career equal to being a fanatic of it?

I don't know why, but while my labmates (as in, research lab-mates) aim for more and more papers published each year, my primary goal is *ahem* to contribute cover/frontispiece design(s) for my or my fellow groupmates' paper(s) and have them pinned to the board in front of my prof's office or pasted at the lab. It's not like I put my own publications behind; sure, I really want to publish more too - it is a privilege for an undergraduate here (suddenly an image of Natalie Portman passed by), but it won't be perfect if I have not achieved the aforementioned goal. Weird? Yeah.

My strong attachment to cameras and my habit of taking photos of anything, everywhere (including teacher's notes and unposted lecture slides since I was in junior high) plus enjoying my spare time (or having guilty pleasure my mind refreshed in busy times) with photoshop make me wonder if I'm a real full-time budding chemist..

Sheesh. My fellow friends in chemistry or those in physics and maths who are seriously pursuing their majors often relate to their respective fields in their convos.. Wow. Again, it's not that I'm not serious in here, I really love what I'm doing, I just think that I don't sound as enthu as them *staring at my camera, then to the ICES brochure at my push-pin board... and thinking, why I'm so contradictive?*

I hope that being a real chemist does not mean having mind filled with a fanatic enthusiasm on chemistry 24 hours a day, 7 days a week..

Oh anyway, I finally took a sip of this! One of my friend had bugged me to try this since, like, 2 weeks ago. I think she's a fan. Good that a fundraising event had this sold on campus, otherwise she will have to join the long long queue at Iluma for her obsession (OK, the Ang Mo Kio stall is said to have shorter queue, but I still don't understand the fuss). LOL. Anyway, I think the milk tea taste was not very intense, like it had too much water in it.. Maybe it was because I did not drink it immediately when it was still fresh and cold.. But it was smooth and the pearls were chewy. Well, at least this has much more appropriate feel than hawker's ones which are super intense.

Counting down the days

A friend and I predicted the number of years remaining in our lives, and what we are going to do with it. What we are going to do after graduation, what the plans that are thought, where we will settle down with our lives, which career path we are going to take, etc etc.

And I realized one thing.

Life is SHORT

true
true
true
true

20 years are indeed, short. And I only have a very, very, very few multiples of them to add to my life. Summing them up, they are still SHORT.

Well, the good thing is, it's never too late to start planning your life, and enjoy every sweet bit and bitter piece of it. As cherries are fun, and dark chocolates are awesome. And coffee, be it latte, mocha, espresso, macchiato, cappuccino or coffee liqueur are ALL superb and come in many different tastes and varieties. Just like... What else, life.

Halal flavors

A friend posted a shoutout about Ben & Jerry's halal certificate for several flavors. It was highlighted in this blog: http://www.worldhalalquest.com/2010/05/ben-and-jerrys-ice-cream.html.

The certification does not affect me, since I don't need that certificate to consume something. However, I feel glad that now Moslems can finally consume their ice creams (because Ben & Jerry's is delicious yet expensive). Anyway, why the flavors like vanilla, chocolate, brownies and strawberry shortcakes are not halal? I think they are good on themselves even without alcohol, or is it because the animals where the dairies and animal-derivations come from are not halal-certified? Despite all of those thoughts, seeing this from business point of view, this is more to touch the psychological aspect of assurance of the quality of the products and of course may widen the market. =P *no offence*

There are some flavors that do need alcohols or liquors to enhance the flavor and you just can't take the alcohol away from them, otherwise it is just not right. Of course they will not be halal until eternity. An example:

I am 100% sure that this is NOT halal. Dublin = Ireland = Irish = liqueur. No liqueur = not Irish, isn't it? YES. I just want to know if this flavor have restriction for underages? =P

Drawing from the example above, is the flavor of Rum and Raisin halal? It is not specific to Ben & Jerry's, but all brands. As far as I know.. Rum is alcoholic. And anything alcoholic is not halal. I stayed in Indonesia, where most Moslems are populated, for 18 years in my early life, and am still going back there in vacation periods for sure, and I know that most ice cream brands (local or international, home-made or factory-packed, street vendors or amusingly-expensive-only-can-be-sold-in-big-malls) sell that flavor while almost all foods sold there need halal certificate.

I asked that friend, who is a Muslim, about this flavor. And she admitted that rum is indeed, alcoholic. Then why is it still halal? She just replied that most Indonesians (implied meaning: Moslems) don't care about this as they assume that most foods are halal (I hope they don't assume the same thing to Tony Roma's pork ribs.. it is very OBVIOUS) and hence, "safe" for consumption. So, it depends really on yourselves, whether you want to put that specific flavor in your tongues and swallow it down to your stomach (even though personally I don't fancy the flavor, but I know that it tastes nice) or stay away from it and choose other flavors that are equally delicious (mint chocolate chip, anyone?).

I am not saying that Rum and Raisin should be banned in Indo since Indonesians are not 100% Muslim the same as I doubt Ben & Jerry's will go all halal and discontinue the production of Dublin Mudslide, but with the "anti-alcohol" sort-of-policy in the religion, the integrity is on test. It is like indirect consumption of alcohol, if the rum there is "real" rum. But if it isn't, they still taste just like alcohol! So you still can taste alcohol while you are not supposed to! Comparing with vegetarians buying meats-look-a-like (texture-wise and taste-wise) in a vegetarian stall, which IMHO quite strange since they only eat veggies and dairies and not "meat" in any forms (literal or non-literal)?

But for now, let's just enjoy the fact that Ben & Jerry's has 10 halal flavors with a cherry cola toast!


Eh... This is not halal yet. Sorry. Hopefully soon (I think there aren't any non-halal ingredients?), and more people can taste this cough-syrup-like flavor!~ <3


all pictures are from http://www.benjerry.com.sg

About quotes

"It's funny how no matter how different our stories or situations are, we all can relate to quotes and each other."

- twitter

To follow or not to follow

I am contemplating now whether 2 semesters of "overloading" (the "real" overload, not literal) really worth the effort and time. Sometimes I feel like I wasted my brain, time, and energy. I was overwhelmed, pressurized, having continous headaches and pains, living a stressful life and tired to do everything else. As the result, I slacked off, then wasted the result that I should have gotten.

"Being challenged in life is inevitable, being defeated is optional." - Roger Crawford"

"There are no secrets to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work and learning from failure." - Colin L. Powell

A friend once suggested that I should not really rely on whatever seniors told us about modules and semester burden. They were simply suggestions based on how they saw the modules from their perception and their situation at that time. Just believed in myself, and what did I think of the modules. Yes, it is indeed true. When I put some trust in myself and had myself decide, I got better result.

"People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing" - Dale Carnegie

I don't say that seniors' and friends' opinions are bad and worthless. They are really helpful to get some insights on modules and things, the pros, the cons, their ups and downs, since they have encountered the same-but-different thing once. Knowing how to succeed and learning from their mistakes. Their opinions may come in quite a high level of accuracy. But some things to note are that they did it in different situation (such as, they were not in a batch full of hardworking and overly smart people), they have different traits, preferences, strengths, weaknesses and abilities. In the end, it is you who are going to "walk this journey", and it is up to you who decide and live up the path you have chosen. So.. Think, think, think and think before you do something. Gain opinions, and decide your own path of happiness.

Perfectionism

http://sg.finance.yahoo.com/news/How-Perfectionism-Hurts-Your-usnews-1180775693.html?x=0

I must agree on the idea that nothing is perfect and sometimes being perfectionist may limit whatever things you are willing to try, and even give you unproductive and unnecessary pressure..

"Better to do something imperfectly than to do nothing flawlessly." - Dr. Robert Schuller

Because nothing, even though they are done flawlessly, do not exist.

But is it OK to simply say that things are "good enough" when you can work it out to give better output? Chasing after whichever potential opened up is indeed, perfecting what you are doing, right? I don't think it's a bad attitude as long as the perfectionist can put his/her attitude in the right place, situation and condition.. Am I justifying myself? Perfectionists do come in different ways.

"The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is that little extra." – Jimmie Johnson

"Don't settle for less than you really want now simply because it's easier to achieve or even because it's a sure thing. You don't need to limit yourself. You don't need to take less than you deserve. Dream big, and you will achieve big things as long as you pursue them with your heart and soul." -tumblr

Are they truly superior?

A friend posted this for his friends to (hopefully) read, and as I gaped I couldn't resist to comment.

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704111504576059713528698754.html?mod=WSJ_hp_mostpop_read


I won't judge any education or parenting ways because each of them has positive and negative sides on its own. I am just concerned about the effect they have on the childrens, especially after reading the comments. Research discussions, self-experiences, hate, suicides of family, to name a few, put me in awe.

I won't say, neither, that I did not face all those things the mother claimed as superior. Being a Chinese-descent, I did experience what the writer self-claimed as the best way to raise children. In elementary school, I was scolded when I didn't bring good marks with me. Yes. But I think this happened to every children, especially when their parents thought that they really could! I was trained for maths as a fundamental lesson each kid needs to have, but now I don't end up as a math student (even though my current study is quite close to it, well, science/engineering fields are interconnected to one another). I was kind of "forced" to play either violin or piano and the members of their respective family, but well, it seemed that I didn't acquire any talents on them. I ended up doing something else which are equally useful and fun for me. I was never forbidden from school plays; my parents continously pushed me to on-stage performances and social engagements, it was just me who was being all anti-social and introverts that I preferred doing all backstage acts and organizing committee involvement and stuffs.. And ya, I am still an introvert. I prefer to take photos, organize events, publicize, design props, backdrops and decorations or write reviews rather than be on-stage in a sold-out performance in an auditorium. It is just a matter of self-satisfaction to me when I feel I can use all my energy and talents to them. And who said that people who stayed in backstage can't socialize? They may as well gained a big big social network! I was angered by a middle-school IQ/EQ test results who claimed so, and some people who just generalize. On sleepovers, well I don't remember having those memories, but maybe it also dealt with the fact that I am the only children of my parents..

Back to the main topic, my parents never tried to change me to someone I don't. I had never forced to stay awake all nights to catch up on my studies by them (so, by someone/anything else? LOL. I admit that I am perfectionist, and clearly ambitious at times ;)). They gave me inputs and choices, but in the end I would be the one who had the responsiblity to find out what I really want to do, and they have been supportive about that.

School plays, music instruments outside piano or violin and sports are achievements on their own. Maths, physics, chemistry, biology, geography, art and literature are good in their own way. Which parents wouldn't be proud of their children if they achieved something that make them felt whole, proud and, if I may give an interpretation to the article, famous? Award-winning movie stars or filmmakers, highly-acclaimed writers, high-class musicians, managers, photographers, scientists, designers, lawyers, doctors? None of them is worse than the other. I believe every parents would, and they wouldn't be willing to bear sadness when they saw their children reaching lives that made them unhappy even though they gained all the wealth and fame, or eventually hate them for turning them to somebody they aren't.. Afterall, they are people who have minds and feelings, not robots.

I agree that parents are responsible for the kids they are raising, but what is better than having children being thankful and proud to have their parents in their life?